Some followers don’t like or comment on my posts

It hurts when people don’t engage back on social media. Why don’t they?

Some followers don't like or comment on my posts.

Social media is meant to be enjoyable. It is intended to bring joy. Therefore, it ought to make us feel desirable. We should be feeling likeable (wanted.) And when we're not feeling likeable (wanted) it makes us feel sad.

I’m curious why some of my social media followers don’t like or comment on my posts. What makes some people unwilling to give back what they receive?

Example One: I’ve been a long-time follower of someone on Instagram, consistently loving their posts. I make it a point to leave positive comments on their images and sometimes share them.

However, it occurred to me—in fact, it hit me hard—that this person had never interacted with any of my posts. They have never returned the compliment. It’s an unbalanced situation. It's a one-sided friendship!

I’m not seeking validation. I’m just trying to understand how some minds work.

Why do they choose to ignore my posts? I'm guessing it’s one of these reasons:

• Their focus on self-promotion leaves no time for engagement with others

• My posts aren’t as engaging as theirs, so they aren’t motivated to respond back in a reciprocal fashion

• They have an inflated view of themselves and their work, perhaps 'looking down' on other networkers.

• They don’t understand that social networking offers more than just self-expression: it’s also about complimenting or commenting on others images and stories! It's about being nice. It's about being sociable.
  

• Some people are only interested in what they’ve created themselves. It's simply their nature
  

• Some folks might think that expressing appreciation for another person, or another person's work, shows weakness

  
  

• It might just be mathematical. It’s estimated that only 10% of followers ever get to see your posts; therefore (coincidentally) these people might never have seen yours so have been unable to make any comment (or click the like / love button) because they didn't know you'd been doing anything!

Example Two: I have a twelve-year-old friendship with someone on another platform. Every birthday, I make sure to post something nice on this person's page. I commemorate the event with a thoughtful message. I learned today, when I posted yet another birthday message on her page, that she has never responded to any of my previous ones. No thanks, no thumbs up, no clicks of the like button.

Upon reviewing, I discovered she hadn’t ever sent a birthday message to me over twelve years of friendship, nor had she liked or commented on any of my posts. This is a completely lopsided deal! Why has she been shutting me off? What have I done to upset her?

• Perhaps she’s turned off the birthday notifications on her app

• Perhaps she doesn’t care about birthdays (hers or anybody's)

• Perhaps she couldn’t care less about me or anything that I do

• Perhaps her self-importance renders her indifferent to my opinions!

• Perhaps she fails to realize that kindness requires reciprocity

Maybe these people are just plain lazy.

I’m also open to other explanations for their unresponsiveness, hoping it isn’t arrogance or conceit that causes them to be behave in this self-centred manner.

For example, I’m prepared to explain their antisociality by supposing it might be due to their poor grasp of social media.

Here's the good news! If this type of thing has ever happened to you, if some of your followers and friends are not liking your images or commenting on your posts, please don’t worry: it’s not you, it’s them! You did nothing wrong.

A quick check-up on social media revealed that the people I mentioned in my examples get far less engagements-per-post than I do.

And that's probably because:

• The core function of any social media platform is to link people together and help them communicate with each other. If a member fails to reciprocate, they might be punished by the algorithm

• The algorithm will punish users who choose not to continue a conversation

• Social media thrives on interaction. Those who choose not to interact might find they're penalised by the system
  

• The algorithm rewards users who mingle and engage with others on the platform.
  

• Some users aren’t aware that the algorithms prioritize engagement, such as commenting, liking, and sharing posts. If these users don't comment, like, and share, they'll see their engagement slipping!

Let me know if you have any tips or comments.

© Neil Mach 2024